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A long Time Coming

I'm glad I didn't know that it might take a year to move from the shock of the final betrayal, the beginning of the end of 26 years, and through the divorce process and close to the point of beginning my new life. I know it could be worse, I've heard the stories of folks who have gone through worse for a longer peroid of time. I have much to be glad for and I am. I am not bitter. I am not quite completely spent either. But it has been a trial for me. I am not the same person I was a year ago. I hope that my energy comes back. I hope that my joy in things I use to love comes back. I think it will once all the details are settled. And I have some truely wonderful friends who cheer me everyday!

I am 50 years young and not too old for this new beginning. I have picked out a home and property that would suite my new start just fine. I am close to knowing if I can swing it ( or rather if the bank agrees when I tell them I can).

I have managed to keep the horses, and the dogs and a few chickens. And they've all managed to stay healthy (knock on wood--praise God ect.) I think the horses believe they are officially retired to a life of leisure now though. I didn't lose my job. My old car is still running. I didn't quite lose my mind. My health is good.I think it's all gonna be ok. I will be back to working on the blog and keeping updated on this journey in motion-- soon.

Tomorrow I take back my maiden name. The name I had when I was such a dreamer. When all things were possible.

Comments

Nuzzling Muzzles

So sorry it's been a difficult year for you too. I see that you are counting your blessings. I'm glad you were able to keep the animals. I've seen a lot of animals go to new homes during divorces. It's got to be so hard to have to change everything when you weren't exactly planning to change things. I suspect a lot of divorce survivors experience Post Traumatic Stress, which is a medical term usually associated with war survivors. Having an old car that still runs is no small feat. My 10-year-old truck hasn't let me down, but there are now reports of the gas tank rusting out, falling off and exploding, so I looked under the chassis and saw that everything under there is rusted out. It looks like the entire floor of my truck and everything underneath is about to fall off, so I'm hoping to be able to buy a replacement truck before that happens. I'm always amazed when someone can hold down a job while going through a divorce. I'm sure you want to just crawl under the covers, but I think having a job probably helps to get you from day to day just because it is a routine you understand.

funder

This might sound weird, but congratulations! Good luck getting that new property and keeping your beloved animals. It'll only get better from here.

julie

just read your post on seperation anxiety in horses my silly new mare just injured her self having a frantic because i took her friend out for a walk i shall use these tools and hopefully she will not be a nutter lets hope she heals well and she hasnt cracked her hip thankyou so much remeber your talents rediscover your own inner beauty and keep seeing the wonderful in your days blessings to you in this time julie oz

ELB

Thanks Julie, Best of luck to you working to make your mare more comfortable with separation.

Patti

you will get your energy and joy back and i have a feeling you are going to enjoy this new journey just fine

Strawberry Lane

What courage you have ... and a wonderful attitude. Keeping your animals is great news! Old cars that are still running are keepers! With your former name, you will get back your former dreams. Good luck!

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